While this mildly asinine anthem Apple penned in homage to its new iPhone is a pretty silly stretch, it's surprisingly pertinent to Adobe's new developer package, Creative Suite 5 Web.

Sign a liability waiver and join us Wednesday, July 14th as we repeatedly blow your minds with all of the sweet, creative innovation brimming from a 7 title, $510 upgrade that can make you noticeably more productive and markedly more impressive sounding to your friends and relatives.

Throughout this repeat mind-nuking you'll delight in demos of Dreamweaver CS5's:

• KILLER new upgrades to Live View and Live Code integration
  
• In-IDE CFHTML inspection and prototyping
  
• Trinoculars mode, letting you navigate, independently search and EDIT 3 separate portions of the same CFC simultaneously and independently
  
• Integrated LIVE ColdFusion debugging output letting you performance tune and scope inspect as you author like it was 2015!
  
• Ability to broadcast your Dreamweaver session as live audio and video in an IMPROMPTU WEB-ACCESSIBLE MEETING ROOM WITH UP TO 2 OTHER CODERS FOR FREE ANYTIME!!! Collaborate much?
  
• Live, as-you-author CFC documentation integration
  
• Custom-tailorable ColdFusion code-hinting ( to the way you write CFML )
  
• Rich, natural Subversion integration!
  
• Powerful HTML 5, CSS 3, and ColdFusion 9 support
  
• 10-second cross-browser CSS layouts
  
• Multiscreen preview and media query support
  
• Streamlined cross-browser testing
  
• Remote compare ( lets you see the exact differences between a local file and one on a server before you upload independent of version control )
  
• Multi-server registration and distribution support
  
• Integrated web standards validation ( ColdFusion aware )
  
• Rich source code searching and refactoring
  
• An interface that looks and feels up to 10x more professional and attractive than any other editor alive
  
• Brilliantly flexible keyboard interaction architecture
  
• A quick refresher on the oft taken-for-granted prowess of "design view"
  
• AIR 2.0 and Fireworks integration
  

If you've always dismissed Dreamweaver as "a designer's tool" this is your chance to feel overwhelming remorse, possibly burst into tears, and catch up on the unparalleled productivity and delectation you've been starved of in your Eclipse-driven prisons.

Fireworks CS5's:

• Powerfully upgraded CSS generator ( lets you easily export your design to a tableless HTML layout driven by CSS for immediate use in development )
  
• Sizable performance gains on identical hardware
  
• Enhancements to pixel boundary snapping and precision
  
• Compound shape drawing tools that preserve architectural integrity even after effects and cross object merge operations
  
• Blazey properties panel responsiveness and new context-sensitive shortcuts when working with vectors
  
• In-panel aspect-ratio constrained object scaling
  
• Gradient manipulation enhancements
  
• Color picker usability improvements
  
• Slice management enhancements
  
• Various pages and layers workflow enhancements!!
  
• Pre-commit page previewing
  
• Various text editing and layout enhancements
  
• Souped up per letter kerning and tracking keyboard control
  
• Flash Catalyst integration
  
• AIR 2.0 and Dreamweaver integration
  

Flash Pro CS5's:

• Rich Flash Builder integration!!!
  
• Print-quality typography ( puts HTML5 to shame ) driven by the new Text Layout Framework
  
• Huge performance gains when Flash Remoting to ColdFusion 9
  
• Much improved Actionscript editor w/ custom class code hinting and completion
  
• New XML-based .FLA source files letting you take full advantage of version control for Flash apps
  
• Code snippets panel with production-ready code samples
  
• On-stage video scrubbing and interaction
  
• AIR 2.0 integration
  
• The ability, if you wanted, to infuriate Steve Jobs by exporting a Flash project as an iPhone app, sneaking it into the app store, and then doing an interview with Oprah where you talk about it.
  

As well as full blown demos of Photoshop CS5, Flash Catalyst, and Flash Builder ( details coming soon ), including Photoshop's revolutionary new Content-Aware Fill feature, also known as "God Mode".

Creative Suite 5 Web is the greatest release ever for ColdFusion developers.

You have been warned.